Beautiful weather, summer right at our claws and a TREMENDOUS sports weekend, what more could you ask for!!!Theme of the weekend: Our feathered friends!
Let's get right down to the highlights:
The Stanley Cup Finals: The birds who can't fly have their arms (I guess that's what you call them) pinned to the ice as The Wings, hockey's greatest franchise (sorry Montreal, you haven't matter in years eh!) is one victory away from hoisting the greatest trophy in sports yet again.
The Belmont Stakes: Blame it on the birds Calvin! Appropriately named Summer Bird flew to the finish outbeaking favored Mine That Bird in the final leg of yet another dubious Triple Crown series. The million dollar question is who was 2004 Belmont Stakes winner Birdstone routing for...he sired both birds!!!
The French Open: At last, all-around great guy Roger Federer flapped and slapped forehands, backgrounds and service aces to finally achieve what Pete never did...a career Grand Slam! Who cares that the Swissman didn't have to face Nadal, who had his oversized wings clipped by Soderling in the 4th round. The Spaniard should have known Soderling was destined to play in the final this wingy weekend, his first name is Robin!!!
The Memorial Tournament: King of the Bird(ies) Tiger Woods birds the final two holes to swoop past Jim Furyk after starting the day 4 shots back. Woods charters a plane to Strong Island this morning and smokes a drive down the first fairway at the famed Bethpage Black. No word yet on whether any fowl were harmed during the 300-plus yard drive.
The NBA Finals: Game 1 was for the birds! No doubt we all wish birds of any feather had similar accuracy issues in shitting on our cars as the Magic did from beyond the arc! Game 2, however, was a wing-biter! Front row Laker fans reported hearing Courtney Lee scream the "Eagle has not landed" when he narrowly missed an alley-oop lay-up as time flew away in regulation last night.
Last but not least, in non-sporting news the life of a small sparrow was thought to be spared at Malibu Beach Club yesterday, but in stunning fashion the baby bird was rejected from the nest!
Initial word is that the winged animal is a distant cousin to Lynn Swann and boyfriend of Jennie Finch. The sparrow will be returned to its rightful owner Tony Hawk, who captains The Lift Off, a fishing boat out of Captree State Park that some bum ankled, Bud Light drinking Long Islanders say can fly!
No comments:
Post a Comment